Wow, I seriously have so much to catch up on! I first want to talk about the passing of my grandpa. This was, I think, the fifth funeral I attended, but each time I go, I feel like the person I am going for is closer to me. I loved my great-grandparents and my grandma on my dad's side (heaven knows I still think about her and miss her), but growing up I was able to see the grandpa on my mother's side the more.
For me (and everyone else), it happened so suddenly. So suddenly I didn't really have time to think about it or pay him a visit like I wanted to until I was there in Salt Lake. I think I came to really understand what a funeral was about. I needed closure. It didn't seem real.
When we arrived there we were swept up in the bustle of things. Family members were arriving, I thought my mom and I could go maternity clothes shopping since we didn't get to around Christmas time, I was struggling a little bit with morning sickness, and my sisters and I wanted to help Grandma out. You know, a lot of the time it seemed like Grandpa must have still been in the house. I obviously knew the occasion of our visit, but I kept thinking that Grandpa was downstairs in his room like he usually was on our visits. It was strange to realize he wasn't there, and I couldn't look forward to him being in this house again.
I thought the funeral service and viewing as a whole was wonderful. The grandchildren sang, the children sang, there were wonderful talks given about Grandpa. The funeral home treated us all very well. The dinner provided to us was delicious. The whole atmosphere was one in which we were grieving a loss because we would all miss Grandpa, but we were happy he was in a better place and happy to be together as a family. I remember sitting in the pews with my husband and the grandchildren were playing with one of my nephews. They were giggling and adoring the little guy. My husband leaned over and told me how Grandpa would probably be very happy to see that right now. That was what this life is all about--family. And what a wonderful posterity he has!
I was quite a bit emotional during the viewing. One sweet old man approached me and told me how he will never forget how he and his family had moved into the ward and Grandpa had so warmly welcomed them into the ward. I said something about how that sounded a lot like Grandpa and then teared up. The poor guy realized he made me cry and quickly hurried away. I felt bad I had made him feel guilty because I really did appreciate hearing that story about my grandpa. He really was a wonderful example to all.
I kept noticing teachings of my grandpa that were passed down to me during his life sketch. My mother would tell us the same things growing up. Like "the truth always comes out." As a child this helped me be honest. As I grew older this saying helped me understand that my good works would have their reward in the end--no need for public recognition. As an adult, this saying helps me be more diligent in a world whose morals are quickly deteriorating.
Grandpa also used to say, " what good is the old stock if the new stock isn't any better?" Mom would use this principle in her own parenting. She would tell us how well we were doing in different aspects of our lives and tell us she was doing her job since she was being "outdone." I still believe she is no where close to being "outdone." She is still a shining example to me. But she seemed to think that because we were excelling in areas in our development better than she was, she was on the right track. I am so grateful for her sacrifice and for Grandpa's teachings in this matter. They are an inspiration to me in my own goals as a future (very soon!) parent.
It was also joked about how Grandpa loved sweets. I definitely inherited this trait. At times I do (though not so secretly) stalk up on sweet snacks! He also passed down his love of the outdoors to me. He just enjoyed being outside. I am also one of those people that just enjoy a good walk.
Anyway, the list goes on. I am grateful to grandpa for being the kind of person I can look up to emulate in my own family. He was always so generous and loving towards people. I have always admired his acts of service and learned to love to serve those around me as he did. I have been blessed to be so supported in by family members. In this way, I know I am Never Alone.
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